Happy Birthday Chet

Greetings my fellow Huggynites and welcome to another Dose of Dick with me Dick Smalls. It's a special week for us here at CoMH as our good friend Chet Ajabagger turned 50 0n the 12th of April. This week we have all your usual favourites, Pick's, Pricks, The Big Question, Jimmy's Poo and Thought of the Day. We're also proud to present our new feature, a tribute to Ruper Grint. Enjoy!




1. Chet Ajabagger



Yes he's 50 this week can you believe it? We certainly can't. We all thought he'd be dead by now but after recovering from his alcoholism Chet's turned his life around and is a valuable member of the CoMH team. How's he celebrating? Well we've had to chain him to his desk to prevent him going on another bender like last year...

2. Keane



Well they're certainly not here because we like their music, I'm a death metal fan myself. We salute Keane these week because we they have spoken out about the Conservatives using Keane's music to promote their self satisfied smugness.

3. Richard Herring



We salute you Mr. Herring for trying to reclaim the so called Hitler moustache. Chet had one in the 1970s and he was persecuted because of that. Hopefully if we stand up to this kind of biggotory we can make real progress.

4. God



Looks like God's calmed down a bit after his weeks of wrath. Rooney's recovered, it's been quite sunny and Chet's liver is still working.



1. Jordan/ Katie Price



It seems like forever ago that Joseph Fritzl was our biggest prick ever with two appearances on the chart. These days Jordan (this week played by a fat emo) holds that record and continues to streak ahead of Daniel Radcliffe. This week we've included her for her shouting at an old aged pensioner about a disabled parking space. Yes she has a disabled son but that doesn't give her the right to abuse our lovely pensioners. They are of course very welcome to abuse her, they don't know any better.

2. David Cameron





Normally we'd keep church and state seperare. But for this smug prick we're happy to break that rule. This man got his wife pregnant so he could win the election, he likes to pretend he's just a normal guy when he's a jumped up little toff. This man is the devil. If you vote for David Cameron you will get AIDS and you will die.



3. Twitter


We've tried to like Twitter but it's just lame. And it keeps getting worse. In an attempt to appeal to young people it's now recreating Romeo & Juliet using Tweets which is just the gayest thing ever.

4. The Pope



You know why he's here, I know why he's here, he knows why he's here. Naughty Pope. (We know this is not a picture of the current Pope but it's quite funny so we thought we'd use it).



Welcome to our new section dedicated to the nation's least hated ginger, our old mate, Grinty. Each week we pay tribute to Grinty by sharing a picture with you loyal readers showing you just why we love him. First up this beauty:





This week: The bullet that killed JFK and I've tested it, it doesn't come from Lee Harvey Oswald's gun, this could be the evidence that M.V.D. needs to solve this case.


This week it's perhaps the biggest of all questions who'd win in a fight between Phil off Eastenders and Grant who used to be off Eastenders.




Well this one's easy. Grant who used to be off Eastenders might be out there trying to solve the problems in the middle east but he's no match for Phil off Eastenders.




Phil is the hardest man in the world and the best damn actor this country has ever produced.



""A hippie is someone who looks like Tarzan, walks like Jane and smells like Cheetah." Ronald Reagan, actor, president, dead dude

Until next time...
Peace & Love
Dick Smalls

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