D. C. I.S. A. F.I.N.G. C.N.T.

Hello dear readers and welcome to another adventure in my world of hate. This week we have a selection of Randy's Retards, another of my rants, another edition of Ask Grandpa, who I'd like to see return as a zombie and a brand new feature about history's biggest retards.



1. People who voted Conservative



What the fuck were you fucking thinking you brain dead fucking retards? You've handed over power to that pan faced cunt David Cameron who will ruin us all. This twat is only interested in screwing us over and as a nation you've all bent over and handed him the Vaseline well not me. Any law he passes I will break, every time he screws you over I will laugh. I'm packing my bags and moving where the Tories aren't welcome. Scotland here I come!


2. Old People


God I fucking hate old people. It's bad enough you don't have the fucking decency to die but then you insist on leaving your houses and getting in my fucking way everywhere I go. You smell of piss and offer nothing valuable to society. Why not just fuck off and die? And why is it that old people are like Pokemon? They have various levels of evolution. You've got your standard old person which can evolve in to a crippled old person that will travel around in one of those god damn battle tanks old people have. Well I say it's time we took out this menace once and for all. Let's kill the elderly and David Cameron whilst we're at it.


3. Gingers




Ginger people really make me sick. They are fucking disgusting and make me won't to vomit my soul out. You have no souls and no right to walk our streets. Maybe it's time we sent them all to live on an island together and then drop an A Bomb on the filthy fuckers.

4. Nick Clegg



We fucking believed in you you fucking cunt and you went and handed power to that testicle shitting mongoloid Cameron. I fucking hate you Clegg you smelly twat.





This week my rant is about you the people of Britain. There are 15 million or so of you that have really fucked us over and led the greedy fucking turd burglars known as The Conservatives to power. The rich will now get richer whilst the rest of us get completely fucked thank you so fucking much you brain dead fuckwits. May you catch AIDS and die slow painful deaths.




This week Mike from Sheffield asks "Is a custard cream just an albino Bourbon?"

Grandpa Maurice answers: "No."

#2 Brian Clough

Old big head could lead this country to world cup glory this summer and he would never have selected Graeme Le Saux.

#1 Joseph Smith

Mormon's are retarded and Joseph Smith is the Mormon king. What a fucking retard.

Let The Rant Begin

The following contains strong language that may offend some.

The views of Randolph Badger do not neccessarily represent the views of the CoMH.

Good day to you all Randy Badger here with my first proper entry here at my World of Hate. Apparently my views are too controversial for the core CoMH blog so they gave me my own blog to let me vent my anger at the world. Well I've only just started so I haven't had chance to recruit my own team so for now it's just me and what really pisses me off. Basically what's gonna happen is I have two sections Randy's Retards which is a bit like Dick's Pricks but without the nancy boy girly nice side of Dick's Picks and then there's Randy's Rant in which I really let rip with something that pisses me right off.


1. Adrian Chiles


The potato headed scrotum from the One Show really grates my fucking cheese. What the hell does this lopsided turd burger have to offer the world? I saw this prick talking to the director of that new movie Kick-Ass the other day. They were talking about how offensive this movie is 'cause it's got violence and a swearing child and what does this flaming nutsack say? I haven't seen it yet but I'm incredibly offended! Fuck off back to Greggs you pillock no one cares what you think. Tonight he was gushing over fucking hippies! He's a grade A wanker if you ask me.

2. Deafoes doing sign language on TV


So yeah I'm sat there in my underwear on a Sunday morning about to enjoy the Sunday omnibous of Hollyoaks when what do I see? That's right a deafo in the corner doing spassy hands which apparently deafies use to talk. They're not even in the corner properly, they shrink the picture down so the "signer" can stand in the corner yet they still manage to get in the way of what's going on. And I watch that bastards making his/her gestures and I'm sure they're just making it all up. Oh and if you're death don't watch TV read a book you dick.

3. James Corden


See last week's A Dose of Dick for details

This week: Self Service Checkouts

So basically you've created a machine that makes me do the job you paid some dumbass school drop out minimum wage to do before? I don't get paid for this but that former cashier is now paid to sit there and watch me do their job? Seriously what the fuck? I enjoy people who are thicker than me working as my slaves. I don't like having the tables turned on me fucko. I don't wanna serve myself that's what the stupid are for. Now sort it out.

Next time I'll have more rantastic goodies for you as I turn my hand to being an agony aunt. TTFN.